Best Picture, French Agricultural Society
Apocalypse Now Redux

Best Patriotic Film About A Tragic American War Event
Lord of The Rings: The Fellowship of The Ring

Bring The Kids Award
Moulin Rouge

Best Christmas Film in England
The Royal Tenenbaums

Best Place To Be in the House
In The Bedroom

Best Picture, Joel Schumacher’s Fondue Club
Pearl Harbor

Least Concern for Audience’s Sore Ass
Michael Mann, Ali

Obligatory Retard Best Actor Award
Russell Crowe, A Beautiful Mind

Obligatory Retard Best Director Award
Steven Spielberg, A.I. Artificial Intelligence

Best Supporting Retard
Sean Penn, Fast Times At Ridgemont High

The Malcolm X Black Spirit Award for Social Change
Cuba Gooding Jr., Snow Dogs

Most Wacky Africans Killed In Three Hours
Blackhawk Down

The “We Miss H.I. McDunnough” Award 2001
Nicolas Cage, Captain Corelli’s Mandolin

Best Restaurant, Venice, California
Arnold Schwarzenegger, Collateral Damage

Proof That Scientology Only Helps So Much
JohnTravolta, Domestic Disturbance

Best Computer-Generated Hair
The “Bin Laden as Jack Valenti” Email

Lifetime Re-Re-Re-Re-Re-Achievement Award
Kevin Smith, Jay and Silent Bob Strike Back

Best Teeny Weeny Old People For No Apparent Reason
Mulholland Drive

Best Foreign Language Film
Gosford Park

Best Prequel
Ocean’s 10

Worst, Worst, Worst, Worst Picture
Rat Race

Muhammed Ali’s Choice for Film of The Year
Please Jesus, Help Me Tie My Shoes

Best Video For Your New Kitten
tie: Cat Crazy Part 4 and Snatch

Best Tasting Atmosphere
Vanilla Sky

I Laugh As You Fail Award 2001
HBO’s Greenlight Yourself feature Stolen Summer

Outstanding Performance by a Bitchy Child
Haley Joel Osment, A.I. Artificial Intelligence

Best Evidence For The Collapse of Human Society
The politically-correct WTC flagraisers statue